I very rarely have a moment of peace and quiet to think. I basically get 15 minutes on the way to work, then I am in the midst of non stop chatter for 8 hours. Then I get 15 minutes on the way home to be followed by non stop chaos.
Anyway... I had some very random thoughts today and I have a few questions for anyone brave enough to answer...
1. Does anyone know what the heck "amp" means on blogger? Some people leave comments and it will say something like "So n so" and "amp'blah blah blah". Why does it say that? And who would want their names to say that? Why don't they change it?
2. Does anyone know if there is a "Diet Coke Patch"? I really need one. It is really almost an addiction. I was thinking that maybe I might ask those who love me to stage an intervention on my behalf. But truthfully, it makes my day to have one. I am so happy the entire time I am drinking it and I would simply consider my life less fulfilled if I had to give it up. But I fear I may grow kidney stones or something because of lack of water and overabundance of syrup. Can that happen?
3. Why do my kids hate each other? They fight all day long about the dumbest things. Each one of them has a sensitive area and the other three will push that button until the victimized child snaps and a knock down, drag out brawl ensues. I have seen fights like that on "COPS"... but for crying out loud, those people are on drugs or have diminished mental capacities. I am the most easy going, non confrontational person on the planet... where have these children come from? I am just saying that one of these days one of these lunatics are really going to do some damage to one of their equally insane siblings and I want the record to reflect that I had nothing to do with it.
4. What the hell is going on with my hair? I used to have really great hair. It was shiny and beautiful and it laid down all nicely. And I move to Northern Utah and have a baby and now I look like I have just walked through a static electricity farm all the time. Nothing I try is working. I have tried new shampoos, new conditioners, gels, mousses, praying... What if I didn't wash my hair for 4 or 5 days and it got all greasy... would that help?
5. Why are Rappers rich? Really? Are they really talented and I am just missing it? So what... they rhyme to a beat. What is so hard about that? Give me a topic and I could come up with a clever rhyme in 30 seconds, but I promise you no one is going to pay for me to get a 14 karat grill. Or at the very least a car big enough to drive all of my bickering children around at the same time.
6. How do babies know that you go from a standing position to a sitting position when you are holding them? Why is it a crime to sit down? Why can't I kill two birds with one stone... loving my baby while relaxing a little? How come I have to STAND UP and rock back and forth and bounce and throw my back out? Why is it that I happily allow a 5 month old to rule me? And be the boss of me?
And finally...
7. When is this tight clothes fashion nightmare going to go away? I need the enormous styles of the 80s to come back. I need to wear an over sized sweater with my high waisted, pegged jeans tucked into my ridiculously large jazzersize socks topped off with my Reebok High Tops with Velcro. SEXXXXYYYYY. I am tired of sucking in my stomach. It hurts.
And that is all
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5 comments:
Haha, most of these questions I am baffled by myself. But I think I can answer one: "amp" stands for ampersand (&). For some reason when people have that in their names it only shows up as html code. I don't have any idea how or why I would know that. Random. And I am not the greatest at making my blog cute but I can for sure show you where I do find the stuff for my blog! Anytime.
Thanks for the laughs. I promise, someday those kids will all be great buddies!:)
I need a Coke Zero patch, so if you find one let me know. And no hair product will cure my hair either...darn Utah. And your tight clothes comment made me laugh cause Emery makes fun of me when I wear loose shirts (he calls them bag shirts and he hates them).
Kaci - I love that you are so YOU! Most questions don't have answers. But from experience, some day your friends will grow up and like each other. Babies have a built in meter that tells them when you sit down, I hate it. And with all those 80's clothes you had BIG hair. Maybe your hair is just ahead of the game!
Chels... Thank you for clearing that up. However if my comment leaving name said amp.Kaci, I'd change that trash. Jen... Let's just change the style ourselves. Long live the big T. And Peggy...I have pictures to prove that you were the big hair goddess. All of us wannabees looked up to your delicious locks. I have a picture of you, me, Wendy Thomas and Norma at camp...and I am pretty sure we thought we looked good. But sheeesh, we kinda didn't. Oh man, I miss those days. Good Times :)
I there! I am JoLynn, Kami's sister in law and I too blog stock you from time to time! I want you to know that I really like you! You are a crack up and I very much enjoy reading your posts! Maybe i like them so much because they are a lot of the same little thoughts I have when myself is talking to myself ( I know you know what I'm talking about:) Anyway, I had wondered that same question about that amp thing I'm glad that someone cleared that up for us and I agree I'd change that too-kind of wierd! Also about your hair thing, I have been having the same problem! In fact just today I told Brian, "What is up with this do of mine?" I have been taking a drier sheet over the top of it and it help a little but if you find anything else let me know! And I too am ready for these styles to change-maybe it's because I'm chunckier than I have ever been except when I was pregnant. YOU on the other hand you look freaking awesome! You go girl! Well thanks for your fun posts and I'm glad your excited to get the shelf Brian is making for you!
JoLynn
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